supported by
/
  • Streaming + Download

    Includes high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more. Paying supporters also get unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app.

      name your price

     

1.
2.
3.
4.
00:58
5.
6.

about

A long unawaited second Ep.

credits

released April 28, 2014

tags

license

all rights reserved

about

A Constant Refrain Berkeley, California

Hardcore for those who don't want to stay posi

contact / help

Contact A Constant Refrain

Streaming and
Download help

Track Name: 2013 Can Rot In Hell
Another part of my humanity
has washed out with the year.
Endless moments to spend thinking
How could my life end up here?

The more of me I put in things,
the more disaster that it brings.
I’d disappear, and no one’d know,
except the people that I owe.

Trite attempts at happiness
whose price comes all too steep.
There’s always the most hope
just before despair is reaped.

The less mental stability,
the less people can take of me.
This endless wheel of fucking up,
when will I do things well enough?

That day will never come.

Everything in my life is falling apart.
Everything in my fucking life is falling apart.
Apart.
Track Name: This Has Been The Coldest Winter
Working for a change,
but I’m back in the same place.
Wasted years, and wasted hope,
are thrown back in my face.

Tell myself I’ll be alright, but
Winter’s coming, Winter’s here.
Somehow after all these years,
I`m still ruled by self hate and fear.
The night, it falls so early, and
Winter’s coming, Winter’s here.
Walking silent streets alone,
to empty houses I call home.

I spent my life building shelter,
but I’ve got nothing to show.
I’m gonna burn down my whole life,
and everything I know.

Tell myself I’ll be alright, but
Winter’s coming, Winter’s here.
Somehow after all these years,
I`m still ruled by self hate and fear.
The night, it falls so early, and
Winter’s coming, Winter’s here.
Walking silent streets alone,
to empty houses I call home.

Even when it`s so cold you can’t sleep,
and you can see your breath.
I still drink my water with ice,
I’ve got this masochistic streak to run through my whole life.

My obit’s going to read,
”World’s slowest self-demolition finally complete”
I can’t feel my hands, and my heart is numb.
Living in the land of the setting sun.
Track Name: Negative Hardcore
Bootstrap kings chant slogans,
as hopeful as meaningless.
Resurrect the American Dream,
the Island Self of naive success.

And every song tells me to look for
’What`s Inside’
But there’s nothing there,
I’ve died so much to stay alive.
Emptiness and Apathy
sound better than vulnerability
to a world that wants me dead,
I reject your platitudes instead.

Self help gurus with microphones
try to sell their PMA.
You don’t know my mind,
or the days I’ve stepped so close to graves.

And sometimes I want it to be true,
believe that I could start anew,
but that’s not what it`s like for people like me.
And self delusion will not set you free.

And every song tells me to look for
’What`s Inside’
But there’s nothing there,
I`ve died so much to stay alive.
Pessimism doesn’t mean I’ve failed,
it`s defense against a world derailed.
Your words don’t resonate,
I`ve lost the ability to relate.

Packed empty rooms, desires entombed.
I think I’d kill for something more.
With silent days, a turn of phrase.
I think I’ve lost what I am fighting for.

We raise our eyes but cannot see.
There is so little left of me,
There is so little left of me.

I don’t believe
in Happiness.
I just believe
in Emptiness.
Track Name: 2926
Does the emptiness come from me
or the room that I am in?
Lift your voice and sing
the anthems of our youth turned sour notes again.

Can’t close my eyes because my mind
takes me to places too painful to stay.
With daily reminders around me of
how I managed to fail in every way.

Living every day and night
in a mass grave of memories.
You can’t unhear, you can’t unsee,
the echoes of a life that couldn’t be.

Can’t open my eyes because my mind
takes me to places too painful to stay.
With daily reminders around me of
how I managed to fail in every way.
Track Name: You Can’t Go Back
Feeling
Another year slip through my hands.
That’s the sound you hear when you know you've failed,
but there’s no turning back
Fearing
to write down one more cliched verse.
It`s not just that I’m stagnant,
it`s that I’m becoming worse.

No Arc of Triumph for my return,
No transcendence, and nothing learned.
So much changed, but it feels the same.
One home lost, with nothing gained.
My only continuity
is shame and volatility.
Take me back to the
days that never were.

Losing
what little hope that I had left.
And yesterdays are like former lives filled with
promises not kept.
Choosing
to let the illness rest in me.
And when my eyes are tired that black spot
still follows me.

No Arc of Triumph for my return,
No transcendence, and nothing learned.
So much changed, but it feels the same.
One home lost, with nothing gained.
My only continuity
is shame and volatility.
Take me back to the
days that never were.

And my mind, like the Kansas sky,
threatens to swallow me.
Every moment of my life collapsing into
one single memory.
They say you can’t go back.
And I know that you can’t go back.
But I`m living my future
keeping my head stuck in the past.
Track Name: Burn Me Alive
These are the thoughts that I try to resist.
I don’t think there’s a place that I can exist.
Not in connection, or community.
I turn to rust everything I see.

And how
can this not seem like the end?
A lifetime filled with the same mistakes
I make over and over again.
Just like this song I've heard before,
Just like this life I've lived before.
I`m too full of memories,
and words spoken like eulogies:
”Living like this is killing me,” well
living like this is killing me, so
Burn me alive.

I harm myself too much for others to bear.
When I look to the future, nothing's there.
I've gained an inch for all the miles that I've fought.
I raise a prayer to the suicidal God.

Burn me alive, it will provide
the only light I have to use as a guide.
And even martyr fantasies
are manifestations of my vanity.
Burn me alive, I can't do this again.
All beginnings echo their predetermined end.
And bury me where the roots cannot reach,
so I'll be dead the way that I was alive.

Alone.